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Annual Stella Awards

Discussion in 'Channel Zero' started by Hermdog, Jan 12, 2005.

  1. Hermdog

    Hermdog Elite Member

    Joined: Nov 6, 2003 Messages: 4,504 Likes Received: 9
    These are unbelievable...that they are actually true!!!!! You've got to
    read them.....
    It's once again time to review the winners of the annual Stella Awards. The
    Stella's are named after 81 year old Stella Liebeck who spilled coffee on
    herself and Successfully sued McDonald's. That case inspired the 'Stella
    Awards' for the most frivolous successful lawsuits in the United States.


    5th Place (Tied)
    Kathleen Robertson of Austin, Texas was awarded $780,000 by a jury of her
    peers after breaking her ankle tripping over a toddler who was running
    inside a furniture store. The owners of the store were understandably
    surprised at the verdict, considering the misbehaving toddler was Ms.
    Robertson's son.

    5th Place (Tied)
    19 year old Carl Truman of Los Angeles won $74,000 and medical expenses when
    his neighbor ran over his hand with a Honda Accord. Mr. Truman apparently
    did not notice there was someone at the wheel of the car when he was trying
    to steal the hubcaps.

    5th Place (Tied)
    Terrence Dickson of Bristol, Pennsylvania was leaving a house he had just
    finished robbing by way of the garage. He was not able to get the garage
    door to go up since the automatic door opener was malfunctioning. He could
    not re-enter the house because the door connecting the house and garage
    locked when he pulled it shut. The family was on vacation and Mr. Dickson
    found himself locked in the garage for 8 days. He subsisted on a case of
    Pepsi he found and a large bag of dry dog food. He sued the homeowner's
    insurance claiming the situation caused him undue mental anguish. The Jury
    agreed to the tune of $500,000.

    4th Place
    Jerry Williams of Little Rock, Arkansas was awarded $14,500 and medical
    expenses after being bitten on the buttocks by his next door neighbor's
    Beagle dog. The Beagle was on a chain in its owner's fenced yard. The award
    was less than sought because the jury felt the dog might have been a little
    provoked at the time as Mr. Williams, who had climbed over the fence into
    the yard, was shooting it repeatedly with a pellet gun.

    3rd Place
    A Philadelphia restaurant was ordered to pay Amber Carson of Lancaster,
    Pennsylvania $113,500 after she slipped on a soft drink and broke her coccyx
    (tailbone). The beverage was on the floor because Ms. Carson had thrown it
    at her boyfriend 30 seconds earlier, during an argument.

    2nd Place
    Kara Walton of Claymont, Delaware sued the owner of a Night Club in a
    neighboring city when she fell from the bathroom window to the floor and
    knocked out two of her front teeth. This occurred whilst Ms. Walton was
    trying to sneak in the window of the Ladies Room to avoid paying the $3.50
    cover charge. She was awarded $12,000 and dental expenses.

    1st Place!!!!!

    This year's runaway winner was Mr. Merv Grazinski of Oklahoma City,
    Oklahoma. Mr. Grazinski purchased a brand new Winnebago Motor home. On his
    trip home from an OU football game, having driven onto the freeway, he set
    the cruise control at 70 mph and calmly left the driver's seat to go into
    the back and make himself a cup of coffee. Not surprisingly the RV left
    the freeway, crashed and overturned. Mr. Grazinski sued Winnebago for not
    advising him in the owner's manual that he could not actually do this. The
    jury awarded him $1,750,000 plus a new Winnebago Motor home. The company
    actually changed their manuals on the basis of this suit just in case there
    were any other complete morons buying their recreational vehicles.
  2. <KEY3>

    <KEY3> Veteran Member

    Joined: Mar 24, 2004 Messages: 6,878 Likes Received: 2
    damn good find.

    I want a winnebago.
  3. !@#$%

    [email protected]#$% Moderator Crew

    Joined: Oct 1, 2002 Messages: 18,517 Likes Received: 623
    they are almost all criminals.

    what have we learned folks?

  4. <KEY3>

    <KEY3> Veteran Member

    Joined: Mar 24, 2004 Messages: 6,878 Likes Received: 2
    or football fans.

  5. heavyLox

    heavyLox Veteran Member

    Joined: Feb 2, 2002 Messages: 7,196 Likes Received: 17
    fuck it seems the stupid always win. But you have to be genuinely dumb pretending never really works out that well.
  6. Weapon X

    Weapon X 12oz Loyalist

    Joined: Sep 6, 2002 Messages: 14,905 Likes Received: 202

    NBC sued over rat-eating show

    Friday, January 7 2005, 16:28 GMT -- by Daniel Saney

    NBC is being sued by a viewer over an episode of Fear Factor in which contestants ate rats mixed in a food blender.

    Disgusted viewer Austin Aitken told the Associated Press that he is a regular viewer of the show but that he felt that the rat-eating challenge was going "too far". "It's barbaric, some of the things they ask these individuals to do," said the man who has filed the $2.5m lawsuit.

    His suit claims that the show caused a rise in blood pressure, dizziness and vomiting. He then ran into a doorway "causing suffering, injury and great pain." Apparently he could not turn to another channel in time.

    NBC dismiss the lawsuit as being "without merit". Aitken says that he is not really after a cash settlement, but he wants to send a message to NBC and other broadcasting networks.
  7. Weapon X

    Weapon X 12oz Loyalist

    Joined: Sep 6, 2002 Messages: 14,905 Likes Received: 202
    I thought the states were going to do something about frivolous lawsuits.
  8. <KEY3>

    <KEY3> Veteran Member

    Joined: Mar 24, 2004 Messages: 6,878 Likes Received: 2
    yeah... I heard that they did.
    It used to seem so bad that on days with fresh snow
    people would be up early just to slip on other people's icey patches.
    Or stories about people who had been hit by a car while on foot more than once.
  9. SteveAustin

    SteveAustin Veteran Member

    Joined: Mar 12, 2002 Messages: 7,042 Likes Received: 2
    I'm beginning to think I need to become a judge.

    If some mother fucker set that case down on my desk...I'd be like get the fuck outta here. Whatever happened to common sense and the ability to be offended? Fucking rediculous.
  10. Mr. Chad

    Mr. Chad Member

    Joined: Dec 17, 2004 Messages: 480 Likes Received: 0
    God damn people like that piss me off so much. I knew a girl who spit in her own hanburger and her mom went along with it to try and sue the hamburger place they didnt succeed but still people like that piss me off so much
  11. <KEY3>

    <KEY3> Veteran Member

    Joined: Mar 24, 2004 Messages: 6,878 Likes Received: 2
    I think that 'common sence' should overrule all of this shit.

    Like the woman who threw her drink and then slipped on it.
    Or the woman who tripped over her own child????

    I think these people should get dragged into a public square
    and the judge getsto smack them in the back of the head and shout 'use your fuckin' head for once!'
  12. fermentor666

    fermentor666 Veteran Member

    Joined: Sep 27, 2003 Messages: 8,152 Likes Received: 15
    You sure this wasn't from The Onion or something? I can't see a group of sane people awarding 500,000 dollars to a burglar because he was an idiot and couldn't break a door down.
  13. crave

    crave Veteran Member

    Joined: Jan 20, 2002 Messages: 6,728 Likes Received: 10
    [email protected]#$% got it right, apparently crime does pay.

    i can't believe that the majority of these dumbfucks think of this shit on their own. lawyers with dollar signs in the their eyes and confidence of getting a jury that's just as ignorant as their client.
  14. SteveAustin

    SteveAustin Veteran Member

    Joined: Mar 12, 2002 Messages: 7,042 Likes Received: 2
    I used to work in a restaurant. The manager at one of them busted a customer trying to get a free meal by placing one of her own long red hairs in her food. Dude was brutal. After he informed her he didn't have a single person working under him with long red hair that just magically happened to match hers...he asked if she wanted a box for her food...because she needed to leave.

  15. Kirby p

    Kirby p Senior Member

    Joined: Feb 11, 2004 Messages: 1,034 Likes Received: 0