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An Appointment With Tyler Durden (Tyler Interview Thread)


Intangible

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:king:

BuDdAhMoI7k=IntangibleFame

DrkstBld=Tyler Durden

 

 

BuDdAhMoI7k: So your Tyler Durden?

DrkstBld: thats what my mom sewed into my thong.

BuDdAhMoI7k: You like wearing thongs?

DrkstBld: not often, they tend to ride up. thats really more of a canadian thing.

DrkstBld: the guys in thongs i mean.

BuDdAhMoI7k: oh

BuDdAhMoI7k: so your really popular on 12oz huh

DrkstBld: i dont know

DrkstBld: i dont tend to find my way into those "family" or "bar b que" posts or whatever

DrkstBld: its all for the best though.

BuDdAhMoI7k: Bar B que posts? explain

DrkstBld: the things where the guys do the stuff....and they all wear shirts.

BuDdAhMoI7k: oh ok

DrkstBld: actually.

DrkstBld: i have no idea what the bar b que stuff has to do with anything.

BuDdAhMoI7k: how do you feel about the people who post on 12oz?

DrkstBld: hmmm

DrkstBld: im fairly indifferent to most of them.

DrkstBld: its just words on a screen that occasionally make me giggle.

BuDdAhMoI7k: I heard your good friends with Teaser

DrkstBld: who said that?

BuDdAhMoI7k: I dont remember...

DrkstBld: thats what i thought.

DrkstBld: im fairly indifferent to him too i guess.

DrkstBld: next question.

BuDdAhMoI7k: How did you become affiliated with the ioks

DrkstBld: goddamn kazaa...cockblockin me from gettin some raylene porn.

DrkstBld: ummmm

DrkstBld: a bunch of us made it. we knew that kittens were selling crystal meth to little kids on the street. personally, i hate kids, but i like to kill things.

DrkstBld: mmmmmm brownies.

BuDdAhMoI7k: im sorry

BuDdAhMoI7k: some bum was wanting in my house

BuDdAhMoI7k: i had to go regulate

DrkstBld: cool

DrkstBld: i ate at sizzler tonite

BuDdAhMoI7k: alot of times bums wonder in my house

DrkstBld: assholes said i couldnt get the grilled cheese.

BuDdAhMoI7k: mainly my mom

DrkstBld: becaues its on the kids meal.

DrkstBld: and im over the age of 10

BuDdAhMoI7k: so i tell her to sleep outside and its over

DrkstBld: im all like "no shit. i just want my grilled cheese"

DrkstBld: so they charged me an extra buck

DrkstBld: THEN they brought it out

DrkstBld: it sucked

DrkstBld: i mean

DrkstBld: it wasnt bad

DrkstBld: but it wasnt anything to write home about.

DrkstBld: so i ended up snorting lines of sugar off the table and downing sugar packets.

BuDdAhMoI7k: grilled cheese sucks ass

BuDdAhMoI7k: even at Zippys

DrkstBld: i did 27, till they took my sugar away.

DrkstBld: yeah

DrkstBld: it really does.

BuDdAhMoI7k: ok back to the questions

DrkstBld: super.

BuDdAhMoI7k: do you ever wanna be kidnapped?

DrkstBld: hmmm

DrkstBld: yes.

DrkstBld: by the brazilian girls soccer team

BuDdAhMoI7k: i think that would be really fun

DrkstBld: when theyre partiulary worked up into a frenzy of horny-ness. yes. yes it would.

DrkstBld: oodles.

BuDdAhMoI7k: do you feel you are addicited?

DrkstBld: to what?

BuDdAhMoI7k: tell me a story tyler

DrkstBld: what about?

BuDdAhMoI7k: that one time

BuDdAhMoI7k: remember

DrkstBld: ummm

DrkstBld: the time i punched that baby?

BuDdAhMoI7k: yup

DrkstBld: ah

DrkstBld: yeah

DrkstBld: that was when i was walking to taco bell for a go go tacquito or something and saw some baby by itself on a corner in a carriage

BuDdAhMoI7k: haha that makes me laugh every time

DrkstBld: so i smacked the baby.

BuDdAhMoI7k: so anyways

DrkstBld: a thicket is a bunch of bushes or woods i think.

BuDdAhMoI7k: why doy uo come back everyday to 12oz

DrkstBld: i read about it in "the velveteen rabbit" i think.

DrkstBld: hmmmmm

DrkstBld: i dont know actually....

DrkstBld: its the only site on the internet i go to really.

DrkstBld: which is the worst part

DrkstBld: the whole time im online, im on 12oz.

DrkstBld: and thats truly pathetic.

BuDdAhMoI7k: Do you have "beef" with Pistol?

DrkstBld: but

DrkstBld: ummmmm

DrkstBld: why would i?

BuDdAhMoI7k: ill ask the questions here

DrkstBld: fine, be a cunt.

BuDdAhMoI7k: do you like reading?

DrkstBld: just for the sake of throwing gas on the fire

DrkstBld: ill probably kill him.

DrkstBld: reading? yes.

BuDdAhMoI7k: Whats the last book you read?

DrkstBld: chuck palahniuk is a great man.

DrkstBld: ummm

DrkstBld: im trying to get my hands on "lullaby" which is chucky palahniuks new book. but im reading "the sun also rises" by hemingway right now at my leisure.

BuDdAhMoI7k: whats the last porn you watched?

DrkstBld: hahahaha

DrkstBld: thats funny

DrkstBld: im watching some porn with raylene right now.

DrkstBld: i dont know what its called though.

BuDdAhMoI7k: I have one of her movies

DrkstBld: sometimes, i want to punch blind people and pretend someone else did it.

DrkstBld: things like that make me giggle in class.

BuDdAhMoI7k: a dvd i borrowed for a long period of time for the store

BuDdAhMoI7k: she dies in the end

BuDdAhMoI7k: I cried

DrkstBld: well at least she dies.

BuDdAhMoI7k: Whats your favortie animal?

DrkstBld: i wake up sometimes and just wish the earth would crash into the sun. very fastly.

DrkstBld: ummm

DrkstBld: hmmmmmmmmm

DrkstBld: pandas.

BuDdAhMoI7k: why?

DrkstBld: i want to hunt them for their ear cartlidge, then when theres one left, ill keep it and then publicly execute it and throw the blood all over school children.

DrkstBld: just to anger people.

DrkstBld: then ill paint pictures of doves.

BuDdAhMoI7k: Do you consider yourself the anti-christ?

DrkstBld: hmmm

DrkstBld: people ask me that alof for some reason.

BuDdAhMoI7k: Do you like ot eat green beans?

DrkstBld: no, i dont though.

DrkstBld: nah

DrkstBld: i dont eat alot of vegetables.

DrkstBld: im the least vegetarian vegetarian ever.

BuDdAhMoI7k: true story

DrkstBld: spectacular

BuDdAhMoI7k: Who is your favotie person on 12oz?

DrkstBld: umm

DrkstBld: boboboboboboboboboiii 13 or whatever that person was. they were nice.

DrkstBld: sorry, thats the william faulkner talking.

BuDdAhMoI7k: bobobobobobi13 was one of those people who dont people like you and me....and try to slip us carcinogens in our sleep

BuDdAhMoI7k: so we contract cancer 8 years later

DrkstBld: well

DrkstBld: it sure is.

DrkstBld: i threaten to kill my girlfriend like........5 times a day.

DrkstBld: then again, i didnt vote. so whatever.

BuDdAhMoI7k: Whats your favorite tv show to watch?

DrkstBld: hmmm

DrkstBld: until the new season of the simpsons, anything on the history channel

DrkstBld: MODERN FUCKING MARVELS.

BuDdAhMoI7k: whats that?

DrkstBld: its a show

DrkstBld: about marvels

DrkstBld: and theyre modern

DrkstBld: (oooohs and ahhhhhs)

BuDdAhMoI7k: wow

BuDdAhMoI7k: i dont have cable

DrkstBld: every time my girl talks to me im like "have you ever loved something so much you had to kill it?"

DrkstBld: and she just looks at me

DrkstBld: and asks if im going to kill her

BuDdAhMoI7k: i get to watch the WB all day because thats the only channel I get

DrkstBld: "not yet" is my response.

DrkstBld: that sucks

DrkstBld: i shed a solitary tear for you

BuDdAhMoI7k: after 4 weeks you learn to like Dawsons Creek, and Charmed

DrkstBld: good to see that losing your heterosexuality hasnt embittered you.

DrkstBld: my eyes burn with the fires of a thousand chlydias.

BuDdAhMoI7k: Do you like Zebras?

DrkstBld: hmmm

DrkstBld: theyre kind of like horses

DrkstBld: and horses kick

DrkstBld: and that scares me

DrkstBld: so zebras kind of scare me

BuDdAhMoI7k: ahhhh

DrkstBld: plus they make fucked up noises

DrkstBld: you never know where you stand with a zebra really.

BuDdAhMoI7k: So bascially you feel that time management is important as a student

DrkstBld: im bad at that

DrkstBld: i didnt go to my 2-d class tonite.

DrkstBld: i went to sizzler. got a sticker that says " flirt" from a sticker machine. then drove an hour and walked some tracks in the pouring rain and came home.

DrkstBld: thats what i said when i got kicked out the first 2 times

DrkstBld: however

DrkstBld: now its either tyler gets a fulltime job or tyler does good in school.

BuDdAhMoI7k: Do you feel that wearing boxing gloves is essential to a mexicans wrestlers lifestyle?

DrkstBld: so tyler has to do good in school to avoid fulltime job, rent, and all that crap.

DrkstBld: hmmm

DrkstBld: wrestlers arent boxers.

BuDdAhMoI7k: thats the thing

BuDdAhMoI7k: so anyways now that we solved that

BuDdAhMoI7k: how would you feel if a you sponsored a hobo

BuDdAhMoI7k: and he slept on your floor at night

DrkstBld: i dunno

DrkstBld: theres a guy that walks around town here with a razor glued to a paint stirring stick. hes pretty cool.

DrkstBld: id sponsor him

BuDdAhMoI7k: awesome

BuDdAhMoI7k: do you like care bears or my little pony

DrkstBld: i used to watch care bears mad long ago

DrkstBld: it isnt on anymore though

BuDdAhMoI7k: He-man or Transformers

DrkstBld: transformers no doubt

BuDdAhMoI7k: word

BuDdAhMoI7k: whos your favorite?

DrkstBld: hmmm

DrkstBld: soundwave

DrkstBld: and those little tapes that came out of him and turned into jackals and shit

BuDdAhMoI7k: How do you feel about people riding razor scooters at skateparks?

DrkstBld: it provides me with entertainment. and an easy target for my bike throwing anger behaviors.

BuDdAhMoI7k: I heard you like to attend house parties

DrkstBld: only with fireworks.

BuDdAhMoI7k: so I hear

BuDdAhMoI7k: whats the story behind that?

DrkstBld: everyone does.

DrkstBld: i dont like people. so i try to burn down their houses with fireworks.

BuDdAhMoI7k: How do you go about this?

DrkstBld: walk in

DrkstBld: light fuze

DrkstBld: throw

DrkstBld: laugh

DrkstBld: laugh

DrkstBld: run

DrkstBld: laugh

DrkstBld: laugh

BuDdAhMoI7k: awnser this question

DrkstBld: run

BuDdAhMoI7k: An assisted reproductive technology (art) in what one or more eggs are fertilized outside a female's body?

DrkstBld: laugh laugh laugh

DrkstBld: new zealand.

BuDdAhMoI7k: invitro fertilization

BuDdAhMoI7k: but close enough

BuDdAhMoI7k: ill give it to you

DrkstBld: sweet.

BuDdAhMoI7k: if you could lightfireworks in 1 12oz users house during their house party who would it be?

BuDdAhMoI7k: and why?

DrkstBld: **Edited**

DrkstBld: gas on the fire gas on the fire

BuDdAhMoI7k: you know im going to have to delete that right?

BuDdAhMoI7k: because im DPC

DrkstBld: sucks for you.

BuDdAhMoI7k: ....

BuDdAhMoI7k: so try someone else

DrkstBld: ok

DrkstBld: the **Editied**

DrkstBld: all of them.

BuDdAhMoI7k: .......

BuDdAhMoI7k: im also with them

BuDdAhMoI7k: try again

DrkstBld: really? you dont say.

DrkstBld: ummm

DrkstBld: that bitch **Edited**

DrkstBld: yeah.

DrkstBld: him.

BuDdAhMoI7k: .........

BuDdAhMoI7k: besides me

DrkstBld: ok fine whorehag.

DrkstBld: ummmm

DrkstBld: ok

DrkstBld: keeping with the supposed "beef" with **$%#. ill say **$%#.

BuDdAhMoI7k: do you really hate me that much?

DrkstBld: i hate everyone kind of.

BuDdAhMoI7k: besides him hes a nightowl

DrkstBld: oh shutup pansy

DrkstBld: theyre all nightowls

BuDdAhMoI7k: my point exactly

BuDdAhMoI7k: choose someone else

DrkstBld: fine

DrkstBld: **Edited**

DrkstBld: there

DrkstBld: ok?

DrkstBld: **Edited**

DrkstBld: great.

BuDdAhMoI7k: .........

BuDdAhMoI7k: let me check on that

BuDdAhMoI7k: seems clean

BuDdAhMoI7k: but I swear she was a Nightowl....

BuDdAhMoI7k: just to be on the safe side

BuDdAhMoI7k: choose someone else...

DrkstBld: its ironic that you say 'seems clean' in relation to **Edited**.

DrkstBld: sigh

DrkstBld: A Fire Inside

DrkstBld: ok?

BuDdAhMoI7k: is that a person?

DrkstBld: yes

BuDdAhMoI7k: Ill just agree with that

DrkstBld: k

BuDdAhMoI7k: if you could meet one person ever who would it be?

DrkstBld: off 12oz? or in general?

BuDdAhMoI7k: we will shoot for 12oz first

DrkstBld: hmmm

DrkstBld: probably mr. Ctrl.Alt.Dlt

BuDdAhMoI7k: You know hes my homeboy

DrkstBld: thats great

BuDdAhMoI7k: yhea hes a funny guy

DrkstBld: he sure is

DrkstBld: yeah

DrkstBld: playahataz

BuDdAhMoI7k: do you like clowns?

DrkstBld: nah

DrkstBld: theyre weird fucks.

BuDdAhMoI7k: i know

BuDdAhMoI7k: whats your favorite quote?

DrkstBld: "youd be surprised how far a mixture of apathy and horse tranquilizers will take you"

BuDdAhMoI7k: wow

BuDdAhMoI7k: true story?

DrkstBld: yeah

BuDdAhMoI7k: tell me about that other story

DrkstBld: zzzzzzzzzzzzZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

DrkstBld: sleeep for tyler now

BuDdAhMoI7k: ok

BuDdAhMoI7k: can you leave us with one last word?

DrkstBld: ummmm

DrkstBld: futtbucking.

BuDdAhMoI7k: awesome

DrkstBld: yes.

BuDdAhMoI7k: thanks for your time

DrkstBld: no prob

DrkstBld: laters

DrkstBld signed off at 11:21:28 PM.

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just for those of you wondering (damn your pathetic if you read the whole thing....) but intangible was being a pansy and rejecting all the people whom would get fireworks lit off at their houses. i think my answers were pistol, all of the dpc, dee and some other people. im very tired though and cant think too great.......ow.

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