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Ah, My Wacky Neighbors


Guest Sparoism

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Guest Sparoism

Recently, I've posted a few comments about speed that might have made me sound...well, not exactly for it, but....more that I looked at the individual, not the drug they were on. This point of view has a lot to do with some of my (not so popular) Libertarian views...but the following is just plain absurd.

 

Let us examine The Textbook Case Of The Neighbors Of Sparoism, aka Shai Hulud.

 

These are the folks I was talking about, or at least they were the ones I had in mind. They are White Trash par excellence. They bought the rather nicely built but worn building next door (how I do not know) and have been in the process of "renovating" it since the day we moved in. "Renovating" in this case does not entail capital improvements or building equity, but basically gutting it and making it all but uninhabitable by anyone with any kind of standards. There used to be a perfectly good rear staircase to the top flat....now there is a thirty foot ladder leading to the back door. The lower flat contains NO furniture....but, people are in there at all hours of the night, doing...things. What these things are, I can only imagine. The basement seems to be where some of these "things" are centered around. The top flat seems to be where the people “live� and has had all the windows papered over from the inside so that no one can see in or out- that or it's to keep the light out, I'm not sure which. Naturally, people are in and out of the house at all hours, leading me to believe that there are some kind of transactions being made that probably don't involve comic books.

 

They have set up what I can only call a chop shop next door...cars pull in, and usually don't leave under their own power. There is a driveway that is basically in my front yard, that they see fit to use as an annex to their little fly-by-night Monster Garage. When we moved in, it was clean...now, there is trash and oil stains galore, and a rotating cast of cracked out looking guys pulling the manifolds off their cars to, you know, "clean that shit out and, like, get it tits, dude, I need a smoke, don't fuckin' spray that shit near me, you fuckin' stoopid?" This is usually accompanied by a symphony of power tools and either cock-rock or gangster rap, although none of them are over thirty-five and are predominately white...the power tools seem to obey their own schedule, and it is by no means unusual for them to decide that if it feels good to run a pressure washer or impact wrench at two in the morning, so be it. They also parked a box truck in the driveway for two months, effectively turning it into an alley...I was getting ready to just go ahead and paint a row of crackpipes on it when they pulled it into the yard. Also, to complete the general junkyard feel of the place, they recently acquired a pitbull. For a time, it was off the leash and there was no fence to keep it in...one day, it growled at my girlfriend, so the next time this happened my plan was to scare the shit out of it by throwing an empty champagne bottle at it from our balcony...now he's an inside dog, for the most part. And, there's a fence up.

 

And, the people....the owner is a real piece of work. THESE PEOPLE NEVER SLEEP. At the height of my partying days even I had to rest sometimes...these people, as far as I can tell, have not slept in SIX MONTHS. Their typical means of communication is either A) to yell at each other, or B) fight like cats and dogs. They exhibit most of the borderline psychotic/schizoid behavior that I would expect to see in chronic meth users, but the thing is, it's like they can sustain it...there hasn't been any cops there, or ambulances...the weirdest (and most frustrating) thing is that they don't ever cross the line to where anybody but me and my girlfriend know what they're up to....the neighborhood I'm in is far from idyllic, but it's a RESIDENTIAL NEIGHBORHOOD! As in, there's families on the street that are probably wondering what's going on. Well. I KNOW what's going on, but there isn't a whole lot I can do....except report it here, for your amusement. Eventually, there will be flicks...I just have to be subtle about taking them, as I'm sure they are paranoid to a fault.

 

I don't like calling the cops, as it is against my principles to do so outside of extraordinary circumstances. I went through this kind of shit before, I'll probably go through it again....I may have to have a talk with them someday, and I'll share my theories with them, and then depending on how it goes....maybe I'll be compelled to take some Action. By Action, they will find out how much it costs to replace all their windows, thanks to me and my trusty slingshot and bucket of marbles...or try in vain to remove the gigantic "^SPEEDFREAKS^LIVE^HERE^" blockbuster that gets painted on their front walk with alkyd paint...my vengeance knows NO bounds.

 

This is more in line with Mr. Yuck's backwoods thread...maybe someone can relate. I don't know...I guess we'll move when the lease is up, even though I love this apartment. Then the next people can find out what it's like to live on Tobacco Road.

 

To be continued.

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Guest Sparoism

And, I'm sure you're wondering why I'm up so late...

 

THEY'RE RUNNING A FUCKING COMPRESSOR AT 4 AM, IS WHY.

 

Insomnia helps, but that doesn't matter. I'm usually out no later than 3 or so...this statrted around 2 am and hasn't stopped...maybe they're pumping the rainwater out their subterranean meth lab.

 

Or maybe they want me to go shit on their front porch.

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methheads are a rare breed...

if it was crackheads i could help you out....

 

 

as far as revenge..

 

fake eviction notice from the city..

bottle rockets at the roof

post yard sale signs directing people to go to that house.

sign them up for large amounts of junk mail catalogs via internet..

order pizzas to their pad..

 

 

 

 

 

as far as insomnia..i've had that since i was 8.. best thing that works is warm earl grey tea,or a massage...,reading,lifting weights,doing sit ups or pushups works well mid morning..

porn..

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Originally posted by sect ebc@Jan 7 2006, 02:00 PM

methheads are no rare breed ask anyone out west

 

crankster gangster niggas

 

 

i meant rare breed as in tottaly differnt level compared to other types of junkies..

 

yuh i know all about the west...loma linda..i could never tell when i was enterin/in it/leaving it...and there was only one bus going through it..

odd little town i say

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Man, I fucking hate meth heads... and I know some people that ARE like what you're saying...

 

this fool seriously runs table saws and shit, and then starts banging hammers at 4 in the morning....

 

not to mention the ever present arguing between him and his dope whore that lives there... complete fiends....

 

I als know another couple that are married, they're a little older than me, the guy who's 25, CONSTANTLY plays

 

video games and smokes meth... his wife is a fucking nut case, she has gone as far as to accuse her husband

 

of "getting his dick sucked by the girl under the foosball table"... umm yo bitch, we're playing foosball

 

and you can clearly see, there is no girl under the table, where the fuck can you even dream something that

 

wild up. I swear, that shit is like the worst. People that do meth are like the sumbaggest of redneck trash

 

or fucktard gangsters...

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Guest Sparoism

Drum roll. please.....

 

[attachmentid=27155]

 

The door to nowhere, or "Look out. That first step is a BITCH."

 

[attachmentid=27160]

 

The "car port".

crack1.jpg.4b09992bb022ce20b9a8b50d130ac506.jpg

crack2.jpg.7f992d5f60f17e76587daae2ac6e399b.jpg

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Guest Sparoism

[attachmentid=27170]

 

I'm sure all of you have felt the need for more privacy, but this is ridiculous. Besides, how can you see the secret agents sneaking up on the building?

crack4.jpg.afee1606121d222c52655905e10346da.jpg

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Guest Sparoism

[attachmentid=27171]

 

And, our tour concludes with a ground level shot of the junkyard I live next door to.

 

Last night, he was working on the motorcycle IN THE RAIN and thought it would be clever to use the lift bed of the truck as a jack....in theory.

 

Everytime one of his fuckup roommates would get near it, he'd start screaming at them and threatening to kill them if it fell over.

 

So, should I just go knock it over....anonymously?

crack5.jpg.c34bcad684f89710b6d01c51786e431f.jpg

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looks like a dump! anyhoo i am currently having the same problem with my neighbors...up all hours of the night people coming in and out, the fighting, yelling, the gangster rap, the obsessive knocking and opening and slamming of doors...it drives me absolutely insane. not to mention the 19 yr. old meth-whore who continuously knocks on my door asking for cigarettes, cds and beer at least once a day. recently, she has decided that her doorstep is actually a trash can not only for pizza boxes and beer bottles, but for also dirty, shit-stained diapers that leak and leave stains in front of our doors. the advice given above sounds like fun, yet in reality it's just a helpless situation that i will have to deal with until the NEXT time they are unable to pay their rent and get kicked the fuck out.

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Guest Sparoism

So, my girlfriend is on board with this, I think...at least she sees the humor in it....

 

Uh-oh...they're moving around out there....what now?

 

Maybe I should just set up a webcam. :ballcap:

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Guest Sparoism

Seriously....like I said, if you want to go out and do a little whatever-floats-yer-boat, cool. Drink beer and smoke weed till you can't move, great. But when it becomes a quality of life issue...

 

HAHAHAHAHA!!! I just realized- I'm bitching about this on a fucking GRAFFITI board!

 

Whatever, Channel 0 seems to be where this shit would fly.

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