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A story for Halloween.....

Discussion in 'Channel Zero' started by effyoo, Oct 7, 2002.

  1. effyoo

    effyoo 12oz Elite Member

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    A story for Halloween.....

    Discussion started by effyoo - Oct 7, 2002

    This was in the Calgary Sun ... the title of the article was
    "Best Come Back Line Ever." In summary, the police arrested Ward Branham, a 22-year-old white male, resident of Lethbridge, Alberta, in a pumpkin patch at 11:38 pm on Friday. Ward will be charged with lewd and lascivious behaviour, public indecency and public intoxication at the Calgary courthouse on Monday. The suspect explained that as he was passing a pumpkin patch he decided to stop. "You know, a pumpkin is soft and squishy inside, and there was no one around here for miles. At least I thought there wasn't," he stated in a phone interview. Ward went on to say that he pulled over to the side of the road, picked out a pumpkin that he felt was appropriate to his purposes, cut a hole in it, and proceeded to satisfy his alleged "need." "I guess I was just really into it, you know?" he commented with evident embarrassment. In the process, Ward apparently failed to notice a police car approaching and was unaware of his audience until Officer Barbara Taylor approached him. "It was an unusual situation, that's for sure," said Officer Taylor. I walked up to (Ward) & he's just working away at this pumpkin." Taylor went on to describe what happened when she approached Ward. I just went up and said, "Excuse me sir, but do you realize that you are screwing a pumpkin?" He froze and was clearly very surprised that I was there, and then looked me straight in the face and said, "A pumpkin? Damn...is it midnight already?"
     
    effyoo - Rank: 12oz Elite Member - Messages:
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  2. Abracadabra

    Abracadabra Dirty Dozen Crew

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    Abracadabra - Replied Oct 7, 2002

    we don't celebrate halloween in australia. it's gay. first
     
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  3. seppuku

    seppuku 12oz Member

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    seppuku - Replied Oct 7, 2002

    you sound bitter
     
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  4. Abracadabra

    Abracadabra Dirty Dozen Crew

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    Abracadabra - Replied Oct 7, 2002

    no, i just always found halloween to be a bit pointless
     
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  5. effyoo

    effyoo 12oz Elite Member

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    effyoo - Replied Oct 7, 2002

    who cares if you find halloween to be pointless...did you read the story? the guy was fucking a pumpkin!
     
    effyoo - Rank: 12oz Elite Member - Messages:
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  6. Abracadabra

    Abracadabra Dirty Dozen Crew

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    Abracadabra - Replied Oct 7, 2002

    anything longer than 3 lines i don't read. i have ADD
     
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  7. willy.wonka

    willy.wonka Guest

    willy.wonka - Replied Oct 7, 2002

    !
     
  8. FIST2CUFFS

    FIST2CUFFS 12oz Member

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    FIST2CUFFS - Replied Oct 7, 2002

    at least it wasn't a pie
     
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  9. Weapon X

    Weapon X 12oz Loyalist

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    Weapon X - Replied Oct 7, 2002

    there should be a 12oz pumpkin carving contest.
     
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  10. --zeSto--

    --zeSto-- Guest

    --zeSto-- - Replied Oct 7, 2002

    HAHAHAHA !!!

    If I was the cop I'd let him go just for having such a snappy comeback.
     
  11. Wilt

    Wilt Guest

    Wilt - Replied Oct 7, 2002

    that's what i was thinking....why didn't he just bring that shit home with him...
     
  12. Dr. Dazzle

    Dr. Dazzle 12oz Veteran Member

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    Dr. Dazzle - Replied Oct 7, 2002

    Hahahahahaha.....man, talk about keeping cool under pressure. I wish I had rapier sharp wit like that.....

    :lol:


    *effyoo email me....
     
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  13. Kettiecat

    Kettiecat 12oz Senior Member

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    Kettiecat - Replied Oct 7, 2002

    BUMP

    play on
     
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  14. RAGSOE

    RAGSOE New Jack

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    RAGSOE - Replied Oct 7, 2002

    it gives new meaning to get in where you fit in
     
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  15. effyoo

    effyoo 12oz Elite Member

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    effyoo - Replied Oct 7, 2002

    Dazzle, you get that email?
     
    effyoo - Rank: 12oz Elite Member - Messages:
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