seeking Posted June 10, 2001 Share Posted June 10, 2001 short guys? huh... i guess if you want some little midget dicked dude bangin away like theres no tomorrow... go for it... i however, to quote my man suga dick daddy mista lawnge from black sheep 'i like to put it in fast then i drag it out' blah, im hung over... wheres cuddeling? you know i got game like iverson [This message has been edited by seeking innocence (edited 06-10-2001).] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
*ZEMONEDOE$ Posted June 10, 2001 Share Posted June 10, 2001 fifteen ways tose if a man is good in bed by,some lady. fuck that. 4 things to pleez a man. 1.suck his dick 2.play with his balls 3.make him a sandwich 4.dont talk so much Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Secret Posted June 10, 2001 Share Posted June 10, 2001 Originally posted by seeking innocence: wheres cuddeling? you know i got game like iverson Hahaha Hey! I was talking to you know who and he was telling me all about his road trip. He's coming to LA first, so we might go to the Bay together. See ya soon! http://www.12ozprophet.com/ubb//smile.gif'> And remember... "big things come in small packages". Not that I would know anything about that, but ya know. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
conan o brien Posted June 10, 2001 Share Posted June 10, 2001 Originally posted by *ZEMONEDOE$: fifteen ways tose if a man is good in bed by,some lady. fuck that. 4 things to pleez a man. 1.suck his dick 2.play with his balls 3.make him a sandwich 4.dont talk so much hahahhahahah can't forget the sandwich,, ------------------ http://albums.photopoint.com/j/View?u=1538091&a=11654961&p=49225359'> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
willy!wonka Posted June 10, 2001 Share Posted June 10, 2001 I am all those things and more.. To tell you the truth all the girls I've been with juice me like there is no tomarrow! squirt squirt.. i will lick your tits while rubbing you leg(the one over my shoulder)and from you tits I will make my way up to your neck and to your lushish lips just to go down and softly bite your side to give it a sucking "i'm sorry kiss" while im moving with you every body movement to the ever mood swing of sex.. I please to please myself... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
willy!wonka Posted June 10, 2001 Share Posted June 10, 2001 Originally posted by *ZEMONEDOE$: 4 things to pleez a man. 1.suck his dick 2.play with his balls 3.make him a sandwich 4.dont talk so much but this is true!suck his dick and play with his balls at the same time!ooooooooh Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
suburbian bum Posted June 10, 2001 Share Posted June 10, 2001 NOOOO deleat this, im tall, dress bad, have bad posture, i dont own a dog, im shy and i dont dance well. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vapor Posted June 10, 2001 Share Posted June 10, 2001 yeah geez, what an ass i must be. i do bite my nails tho. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IwearPinkShirts Posted June 10, 2001 Share Posted June 10, 2001 Originally posted by conan o brien: hahahhahahah can't forget the sandwich,, haha you dissapoint me conan. you usually were THUG and pronounced it sammich. I am all of those except i dont bite my nails. And I sure as hell am not short. (High five to Seeking.) And that list is pretty accurate about what guys want. You forgot licking our ears and ass. haha jk. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kid furie Posted June 10, 2001 Share Posted June 10, 2001 mmmMMMmmmMMMmmmMMMmmm...sandwich... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gnes 37 Posted June 10, 2001 Share Posted June 10, 2001 Im slacking in the girl game at the moment but im allways good the second time around Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest dBUSH Posted June 10, 2001 Share Posted June 10, 2001 Lets see, my mom breeds dogs, My dad cooks and would feed me his experiments. I'm 5'10", I love the night life and like to boogie as well. I may not wear pink shirts but my own sense of simple elegance is not to be denied. The last girl I was with insisted I show her exactly how I kissed her again (and again). Im not real sure about thew first one though- I like to sit with my back to the wall, Im paranoid as fuck in restaurants. Zemon is right though... if I'm as good as Cosmo says then PLAY WITH MY BALLS AND QUIT CALLING THEM UGLY!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SIELOETTE Posted June 10, 2001 Share Posted June 10, 2001 aww man....secret dont read those things.. that is some of the stupidest shit I have ever heard........ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EatMorGlue Posted June 10, 2001 Share Posted June 10, 2001 Originally posted by *ZEMONEDOE$: fifteen ways tose if a man is good in bed by,some lady. fuck that. 4 things to pleez a man. 1.suck his dick 2.play with his balls 3.make him a sandwich 4.dont talk so much hahahehehehahahahahahahah i was up til fuckin 2 or 3 the other night cause that shit came on just when i was about to go to sleep. kills me every time though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
charlie dundar Posted June 10, 2001 Share Posted June 10, 2001 that list sounds like me except 5.,6..,and 15.haha Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
willy!wonka Posted June 10, 2001 Share Posted June 10, 2001 Originally posted by dBUSH: PLAY WITH MY BALLS AND QUIT CALLING THEM UGLY!!! hahahahahahahahahahaha.thats the shit!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
999 Posted June 10, 2001 Share Posted June 10, 2001 screw sex, I'm hungry. I'm gonna go get a sandwich. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BoB Hope ONER Posted June 10, 2001 Share Posted June 10, 2001 Originally posted by SIELOETTE: that is some of the stupidest shit I have ever heard........[/b] ha! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boogie hands Posted June 10, 2001 Share Posted June 10, 2001 number 16: his name is boogie hands.....woop, woop!!! serously, those things are complete bullshit, i have no idea who writes those but i doubt they are based on any fact whatsoever. shit, aside from the culinary part and the dressing nicley i didnt qualify for any of them and i can safley say.......I AM A LOVE MACHINE!!!! ------------------ brick, brick ,brick...thats how i be up against your girlfriends ass... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
intercept Posted June 10, 2001 Share Posted June 10, 2001 Originally posted by suburbian bum: NOOOO deleat this, im tall, dress bad, have bad posture, i dont own a dog, im shy and i dont dance well. shit me tooo ........ fuck Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kr430n5_666 Posted June 10, 2001 Share Posted June 10, 2001 http://www.fatchicksinpartyhats.com/images/16fathat102.jpg'> ARE ALL MIGETS FAGS!?? yes of course. ------------------ $$$666MAKROS666$$$ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SIELOETTE Posted June 11, 2001 Share Posted June 11, 2001 Actually those are pretty hilarious secret.. maybe I just like them tall.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
willy!wonka Posted June 11, 2001 Share Posted June 11, 2001 there is sooo much you can say about guys being good in bed but only few about the broads..why is that? can you girls "MILK" a man? "I want my children to grow up in a enviorment where the Bangol Tiger is not just some sex position I invented in the 70's." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Secret Posted June 11, 2001 Share Posted June 11, 2001 Yeah I just posted this for fun. I think a lot of these things are pretty irrelevant to how guys really are in the sack. Besides, I wouldn't want to bed someone just because he bites his nails or faces the wall at a resturant... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jungle cat Posted June 11, 2001 Share Posted June 11, 2001 . i dont bite my nails.. i dress like im from britain(for instance.. right now.. im wearing an adidas jacket that is white.. the sleves are blue.. theres i red line where the white and blue meet.. blue/red lines on the pockets.. um.. tight jeans.. like.. 'loose fit' i guess.. and rowley (vans)shoes.. yeah.. britain.. (i dont know if thats good or bad.. you decide) i like to sit by myself.. but watch whateveryone else is doing.. who the fuck wants to face the wall at a party? im not sure about the y thing. my dog died. is 6'0 short? i eat the taco.. but i wont eat just anything (food wise) i have no idea about posture. i dont like people touching me or vice versa.. unless we are having sex. people say im funny. i laugh almost all the time at the funny noises that come from sex.. but uh.. if someone spills something on me im not gonig to laugh at it. i rarely have money.. but when i do have money it goes to paint and music.. is that spending wisely? ive had mixed feelings about how i kiss. um.. some people say i can dance good.. but.. im white.. so.. they are probably lying. and now im done.. and now i ask myself why the fuck i wrote all this. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest platapie Posted June 11, 2001 Share Posted June 11, 2001 hahahahhaaaa Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest imported_El Mamerro Posted June 11, 2001 Share Posted June 11, 2001 Well, I got bloody stumps for fingers and I can spin on my head. As a matter of fact, a couple of weeks ago, I actually attempted to have sex while STANDING on my head. I only got about 10 thrusts through before I collapsed laughing about the sheer stupidity of the maneuver. My head was about to explode. But hey, I can say I had sex on my head and 99% of the world hasn't. Fuck the mile-high club. Other than that, the list is completely unlike me. Yay!! I suck. Beer, El Mamerro Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest cracked ass Posted June 11, 2001 Share Posted June 11, 2001 This is why women are so fucked up, probably more than half of them believe that shit. I have so little to do right now that I will now write a convincing case for the exact opposite of every one of those non-factoids. 1.HE SITS WITH HIS BACK TO THE WALL on a date so he has advance warning if anyone is about to fuck with either of you. In this protector role he shows both strength and romanticism, a great combination in bed. 2.HE DOESN'T BITE HIS NAILS because A) he's not nervous being with you and B) he knows it's a big turnoff. 3.HIS Y IS NEAT because he's not sketched out in bombing situations; he has the balls to do the job right under pressure. 4.HE LOOKS TO THE RIGHT because he's accessing the logical half of his brain, which he'll need to construct a deft reply to your query about his ex-girlfriends. If he's lying, it's to make you feel good about yourself, and this kind of consideration is important in the sack. 5.HE DOESN'T OWN A DOG. Another sign of his consideration for you. Dogs will bark mindlessly for no reason at any time, possibly interrupting your lovemaking. In fact, dogs are so high maintenance that they will cut into the time he has for you. Also, cat owners have a lot of experience lounging around and cuddling with something warm and furry in their lap, a plus for those long, sultry Sunday morning sessions. 6.HE'S TALL. Short guys just don't have it going on. 7.HE'S NOT A CULINARY ADVENTURER. He doesn't want dietary anomalies translating into heinous fart gas later in the evening when you're getting down to business. 8.HE'S SERIOUS. Particularly about pleasuring you. 9.HE'S COMFORTABLE WITH HOW HE SMELLS. Men who believe they are inadequate unless they rub petroleum-derived chemical slop under their arms and on their face daily are too weak-minded to be creative lovers. 10.IT'S NOT HIS PANTS. It's what's IN his pants. 11.I have to agree with this one. Probability suggests that she can't have gotten EVERY one of these things exactly backwards. But despite the logic, there's no reason to believe a sloucher can't deliver the goods, unless he's smoked too much yerba. 12.HE HAS THAT MAGIC TOUCH: If his touch feels more respectful than ravenous, he's probably gay. 13.HE SCRIMPS AND SPLURGES: (OK, I have no idea how to refute this one, but spending habits have nothing to do with sexual performance.) 14.I guess I can't argue this one either, but the columnist is obviously out of ideas to have to resort to this kind of filler. 15.HE CAN DANCE. Guitar players are exempt from this guideline. They are well known for not dancing, yet getting the babes, and the skillful use of their hands. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Secret Posted June 11, 2001 Share Posted June 11, 2001 Like I've said, I posted this for fun. I don't think there's a way to tell whether a girl is gonna be good in the sack. *ZEMONEDOE$, I think I know how to please my man. Sandwich? Pshhh. Steak is better... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Secret Posted June 11, 2001 Share Posted June 11, 2001 Of course I'm reading one of my very vain women's magazines that encourages sex with as many people as possible... No.1:HE ONLY HAS EYES FOR YOU: The better his concentration skills, the more he can be in the moment. When a man chooses a seat facing a wall, he'll be more likely great in the sack. That's because instead of people-watching, he prefers to focus on his date, which is crucial in the sack. No.2:HE BITES HIS NAILS: (what a turn off... don't do this) The message behind nail biting is simple: He is one intense guy. Nail biters push boundaries, they go to extremes. Ehhh, I don't know about all that. No.3:HIS Y IS SLOPPY: A "y" with a big loop in the tail is associated with high libido. It's also linked with imagination. No.4:HE LOOKS TO THE LEFT: Look into his eyes and ask him about his ex-girlfriends. If his eyes shift down and to the left, that means he's accessing memories that are emotional in nature. It could mean he's a passionate lover. No.5:HE HAS A DOG: Dog owners are so eager to please in bed. This makes sense, given how high-maintenance canines are. Dog owners are used to putting others' needs first. No.6:HE'S SHORT: "Height doesn't matter in the dark," affirms porn star Nina Harley. "What matters is technique". And as for technique, it's reasonable that short guys have that edge. At 5'5", dudes aren't the guys girls flock to. So when a women's in their bed, they'll do everything in their power to keep her there. No.7:HE'S A CULINARY ADVENTURER (Damn Pilau! This article has your name writen all over it!) If your dinner partner is willing to put just about anything in his mouth, it all but guarantees he'll savor every second of sex-- especially going south on a girl. No.8:HE'S FUNNY: A guy that can laugh can get through those awkward in bed moments without a hitch. Suss out out his sense of humor by "accidently" spilling water on his khakis (hell nah.... I would NEVER do this to a guy). If he cracks a joke about the mishap, he's a keeper. No.9:HE SMELLS GOOD: Smell is one of the indicators of attraction. The better a guy smells to you, the more genetically complementary you two may be. So not only would you make great babies (<--- yikes!), you'd have fun doing it. No.10: IT'S IN HIS PANTS.... .... and his shirt, and his tie and his shoes. Good dressers are consummate lovers. They pay attention to details. No.11:HE'S ERECT: A guy's posture is key. If he stands up straight, you can guarantee he won't be a lazy lover. This commanding stance also conveys confidence. No.12:HE HAS THAT MAGIC TOUCH: If his caress feels more respectful thatn ravenous, he'll rock in bed. Nonsexual touching is also a big factor in determining how tuned in he is to your body language. If he can read your body language that well before you get naked, imagine how much more sensitive he'll be once you do strip down. No.13:HE DOESN'T SCRIMP--OR SPLURGE: Whether he has more dough than The Donald or as little as a tragic dot-goner, his bankroll won't determine his doing-it deftness-- what's important is how he deal with the money he has. Being smooth with cash is a sign that he's secure about who he is. Sexually that means he's not affraid to let loose, but also that he isn't a show-off. No.14:HE CAN KISS This is pretty self-explanatory... No.15:HE CAN DANCE: It's proof that he can do it well horizontally. The more dance moves he has, the more moves he has in bed. [This message has been edited by Secret (edited 06-10-2001).] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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